I'm at the Referral Institute UK & Ireland Conference in Bristol. Rubbing shoulders and learning from some of the world's best referral marketing experts. Here's what I learned from the brilliant mind of Sarah Owen, who heads up the organisation in the UK.

If you want more referrals to grow your business, then your objective from your networking and your business relationships should be:

To generate referrals and positive word of mouth from other people you know.

However, this doesn't always work. You want people to say great things about you and recommend you to others. You want people to introduce you to great prospects. But does it happen like you want it to happen? NO.

Put yourself in their shoes. Imagine you have somebody in your network who wants you to refer them. They tell you about their business. They tell you what to say and ask. So why don't you refer them? Here are ten reasons why not:

1. You haven't got the same soul or passion they have for their business.
2. They don't give you a clear target market or articulate exactly what they're looking for.
3. You don't deal with their kind of clients.
4. You don't know any of the kind of prospects they're looking for.
5. You don't understand what they do well enough.
6. You don't like them.
7. They sound like lots of other people, so you don't know how to set them apart.
8. You're scared of making a mistake.
9. You already have someone to give those kind of referrals to.
10. You don't have the time.

So the good news is that you can identify what the problem is. The bad news is that all of these are your fault! In my next blog I'll tell you why it's all your fault and what you can do about it.

In the meantime, read this fantastic article from Mike Macedonio, who is President of the Referral Institute. The foremost authority on referrals I've ever met and an incredible individual. You'll learn when it's inappropriate to ask people for referrals and introductions. Gold dust!