Let's talk about presenting yourself in an attractive, compelling way.

You see, people need to 'buy you' before they buy what you're selling. People will always buy people before they buy products and services.

If everything else is equal, people will buy from the people they like rather than people they don't like. So you've got to understand that 'selling yourself' is a powerful weapon in business.

So if you want to sell yourself and make people buy you, what can you do? Three steps:

So Barack Obama is the next US President! Remember from my bestselling Reputation Book that reputation is what people think, say, do and feel when they come into contact with you or your name. Obama's reputation made millions of people vote for him. But it's funny how millions didn't. Your reputation has many sides, like a diamond. Some people will love you and some won't, with many angles in between. Here's how it works...

What many people don't realise about building relationships is that you've got to go out there and find them in the first place. New friends, customers and suppliers are not just going to land on your doorstep, unless your advertising and marketing is incredible. You need to be a little more proactive. Here are four of my best ideas to help you source and build the relationships you need for profit and success!

1. Take More Risks. Be brave. Take a chance! Approach a stranger. Who know what conversations lie on the other side of a courageous question? Who know what sales lie on the other side of a courageous close? Who knows what romance lies on the other side of a courageous approach?

"Nothing in life is worth having that doesn't lie on the other side of a risk"

Columbian proverb

2. Raise Your Profile. Get your name out there more. Let people know you're there. It doesn't serve your purpose to think small, and it doesn't help your cause to be the best kept secret in the world. Your strategy for survival is visibility, as on old mentor once taught me. Profile yourself with my three Ps - publish (books and articles), present (speaking, seminars) and party (networking).

3.  Keep In Touch. Stay connected after the initial connection. Many relationships are like the seed that falls on stony ground. They never take root, and never get the love, attention, water and nourishment they need to grow. Anyone can say hello once. It's finding reasons to stay in touch, finding ways to help and offer value, finding things in common that is the mark of a great relationship builder.

4.  Be A Connector. Be a conduit that people go through to get to others. Good mavens (as they are called) are good at joining the dots of people's careers, interests and desires. They make great introductions. If you can be a networking hub, people will come to you for advice on who to talk to for all kinds of things.

Get these right, and before too long, you'll be the talk of the town. Your business relationships will blossom and both your personal and company reputation will go sky high!

What impact do you have on people? There are only five ways people can come into contact with you or your name:

1. Internet -  your website, your emails, your e-newsletters, your blogs and online profiles.
2. Face to Face - networking, seeing you speak or perform and being introduced to you personally.
3. Media - by radio, TV, magazine and newspaper articles.
4. Literature - your letters, marketing brochures, books, publications and guides.
5. Reputation - hearsay, gossip, recommendations and referrals.

When people do connect with you, what exactly do they get from you? Is it:

• A friendly chat and a nice smile?
• Expert professional advice?
• Resources to help them build their business?
• Help, tips hints strategies to help them solve problems?
• Inspiration to take action in a certain direction?
• New ideas and ways of doing things?
• Answers to their questions
• Changed thinking and behaviours

Whatever it is, you'd better be making a difference! If you want attraction, differentiation and reputation, you need to consider carefully what people get when they come to you, instead of going to anyone else. If you cannot define and market that, you'll be the best kept secret in the world. And broke!

If what you do is optional, or what you do has competitors, people can choose NOT to use you! Now read that again.

Buyers have choices. What strong brands, persuasive sales people and compelling propositions do is narrow those choices. They blind buyers to the competition and encourage them to buy from you. How do you do that? One of the most important ways is to pay a healthy disregard to your competitors.

"When we stopped looking at what our competitors were doing and started looking at what our customers were doing, that's when we became number one."

If you pay too much attention to your competitors, you are in danger of looking, thinking and acting like them. That's why 90% of banks, accounting and legal firms do exactly the same. You have three choices with competitors:

1. Devote more than 1% of your TME (time, money and effort) monitoring them and allowing them to dictate your strategy.
2. Ignore them completely.
3. Something in-between.

Now I'm not advocating the first two. Why? Because you need to have some idea. You can get great ideas from your competitors on both what to do and what not to do. But keep it healthy! Save room for innovation. Sail your own ship. Plough your own furrow. Do your own thing.

When you do, you'll find that you give people a good reason to choose you instead of all of their other choices, including doing nothing!